Why Couldn't I See Master's Compassionate Hints?
(Clearwisdom.net) When I started practicing cultivation, I could often
feel that Master was constantly giving me hints and guiding me to upgrade toward
higher levels.
However, after practicing cultivation for quite a while, there came a period
when I could no longer feel these hints. Even though I was studying the Fa, even
though I had done a lot of Dafa work and I would search inward for attachments
while experiencing conflicts, I felt that I was not making any progress in my
cultivation and in raising my xinxing [mind and heart nature]. On the
contrary, I felt that my level and xinxing were slowly and gradually declining.
After a long period, nothing was working out right with me and I started to have
some small illnesses. I then started to sense that the problem in my cultivation
was getting quite a bit worse. I could not help but to ask Master for some
helpful hints.
I had begun to observe that other practitioners still had strong attachments.
I could see their attachments very clearly, but I was quite unable to see my
own. Finally, reading Teacher's Lecture at the Conference in Singapore, I
came upon these words,
"In the past, some people said that it was impossible to succeed in
cultivation. How could one succeed in cultivation? [They couldn't succeed in
it] because this was the biggest obstacle and nobody was willing to find
faults in himself amid problems. When a person feels hurt, or when he
encounters misfortune, it's really difficult for him to still examine
himself to see if he's done something wrong. If a person can do that, I'd
say that on this path--on this path of cultivation--and for the eternity
of his existence, nothing can stop him. It's truly the case."
At this point, I had a new understanding. It was not that Master was no
longer giving me hints. Instead, I had become complacent, comfortable that I
could see other's attachments amidst conflicts, but feeling that I did not have
these same attachments myself. I had been thinking that I had always been
"in the Fa," and that it was only the others that were in error. In
fact, in the depth of my heart, I still had the roots of the same attachments as
the other practitioners. My attachments may simply have been smaller and
manifesting somewhat less intensely than those of others. I finally realized
that I must let go of the roots of these attachments myself if I was going to
progress in my cultivation.
After coming to this understanding, when I watched other practitioners
display their attachments amid conflicts, I no longer felt that they had nothing
to do with me. Instead, I began to look inside to see whether I had the same
attachments rooted deeply within me. I find that when I am strict with myself,
and demand that I maintain the state of "constantly letting go of
attachments," my xinxing elevates steadily. I have also become more
attentive while studying the Fa, and able to see new manifestations of the Fa as
I continue to improve myself.
By observing the conflicts and attachments of others, I am now able to
identify and let go my own attachments. Others' conflicts have actually acted as
a mirror for me to observe my own shortcomings. My own level and cultivation
state now improve, and more of the Fa is able to reveal itself to me. Therefore,
when I share my experience and understanding trying to help others, I can do so
with even greater compassion.
During the period of time I felt I couldn't recognize any of Master's hints,
thought karma would often interfere with me, leading me to even doubt my path as
a cultivator. However, I now recognize that whenever I cannot pass tests and
begin to feel in the dark about my cultivation, it is because I have not been
diligent and not truly looked within myself for attachments deeply rooted in my
heart. I now realize that Master is always taking care of us, yet we must also
do our part and diligently cultivate away our attachments.
Posting date: 7/11/2002 |