My name is Ding Yan. I'm a 31 year old hairdresser from Shi Jia Zhuang City, Hebei Province.
Since April 25th and July 20th, I have participated in the continuous efforts to protect and to honor the Dafa. What I enjoy the most is to listen to other practitioners' cultivation stories, many of which are very moving. Today, I'd like to share mine with you.
On the afternoon of October 15th, Qiu Liying from Shi Jia Zhuang Oil Refinery called to inform me that the Dafa practitioners in our Oil Refinery were under surveillance. Authorities had received an internal notice, labeling Dafa as a "cult", and had begun to take action against practitioners. Even practicing at home had become a violation.
Upon receiving this information, my very first thought was to inform other practitioners as soon as possible and go to Beijing right away, instead of waiting for the public announcement. We needed to step forward and protect the Dafa. I left for Beijing that night. After watching the national flag raising ceremony, on the morning of October 17th, I made my stand at Tiananmen Square.
My heart was full of joy when I looked at the splendid rising sun, and knew this was "returning home". Suddenly, I was enlightened to one of the principles of the Fa, and I told a practitioner next to me, "Actually, I feel it's no longer important how high I might ever cultivate. My Life has become meaningful simply because I am linked to the Fa rectification."
I met many practitioners from Shi Jia Zhuang City around the Tiananmen Square that day. We sat down in a circle at the Square together. One of the armed policemen came over and asked, "Are you Falun Gong Practitioners?" We all said, "Yes." So he called for a police van with his walkie-talkie and told us to wait. At that moment, some practitioners from other places had seen us and came over to join our circle. When the police came with the van, they loaded us all on. As the van was leaving, two more practitioners called out, "Wait a second! We are Dafa practitioners too." But the van drove away without them and took us to the Tiananmen District Police Station.
Nearly 200 practitioners were detained there that morning. Among them was a 75 year old woman from Sichuan. The policeman asked her, "You are so old. Why did you still come here?" The old woman replied, "I used to have many diseases which have all been cured. How could I not come? Look at how strong I am now. Dafa is great!" The policeman then asked her, "So where did you come from?" The old woman pointed her finger to the sky and said, "From the universe." There was also a 15 year old boy. The policeman tried to get some kind of statement from him so he asked, "You are so young. Why did you come as well? Are you here to protect the Fa too?" The boy grinned and said, "Of course!" "Does that mean you quit school?" The boy replied with perfect assurance, "Yes!" There were also couples with babies that were only a few months old. All morning long, more and more practitioners kept arriving at the Police Station.
Around noontime, the police told us, "Everyone will have a mug shot taken(similar to those taken of criminal suspects for the police records) and pay the 30 Yuan fee." They hoped that we would cooperate. But many of the practitioners refused to have their pictures taken, so the police forced them to cooperate. When it was my turn, I told them that I refused to have my mug shot taken and also refused to pay the fee. But he took the mug shot anyway. I told him, "I know what you are doing is morally wrong. If I cooperate, then I'm helping the tyrant to do evil." I had the money in my hands but I would not give it to him. I didn't think he would dare to rob me, and could tell that he knew snatching money from my hands would be considered an indecent act. He still had a conscience. To awaken his conscience, I wanted to build a sharp moral contrast between what he knew was the right thing to do and what he had been expected to do, when the other police would, forcefully grab the money from my hands. He moved his hands toward it, but eventually retreated. Later, he called me into his office privately, and snatched the money anyway. At that moment, I realized that the predestined part of our relationship was over. Because appealing will always result in repatriation(back to one's home town), and talking to an appealing official was not permitted, we just headed straight to Tiananmen Square. We wouldn't say where we came from, nor what our names were, to avoid being repatriated. The police were furious. One of them stood on top of a table and yelled, "We treat you as human beings, but you don't even treat yourselves as human beings. We let you go home but you don't want to go home." This obvious hint pointed directly into my heart. Later, they took about a dozen of us who had refused to reveal where we came from into the corridor. They pushed us onto the ground and handcuffed us with one hand back over the shoulder and the other up from the back. They stepped on our backs and pulled the handcuffs, swinging them back and forth, right and left. Some practitioners moaned in pain. They unscrupulously tortured us right therein the corridor, in plain view of the public. It would make one's tremble to hear the painful moans. I didn't utter a sound. At times, I couldn't even breath due to the severe pain. They pinched my philtrum (an acupuncture point between upper lip and nose, often stimulated to cause severe pain to awaken a person in coma -- translator ) and slapped my face. When I was conscious, I thought about Yue Fei: his awe-inspiring righteousness, his loyal heart, his suffering of both mind and body, and his endurance in the Feng Buo Pavilion. An incomparable joy and solemnity ascended from my heart. Only a practitioner could understand this state of my mind. I knew that I was on my way, returning home.
When they found that none of the torture had served any purpose on me, they changed my handcuffs to a pair of copper ones and repeatedly asked me whether I was going to tell them what they wanted to know. Their filthy language was disgusting. They also told me that after a while, the skin necrosis would cause my hands to be crippled. However, I never allowed any wicked thoughts to come into my mind. I heard a practitioner from Chengde next to me telling the police, "I don't hate you! If this can help remove any resentment you may have toward Falun Dafa, and I am willing to endure [the torture]."
Almost three hours later, they took off my handcuffs, fearing that my hands might be crippled. They tried to persuade me, asking, "Why would you like to suffer like this? Why don't you just tell us? You're the only one left." As they attempted to persuade us, two guards found that my hands were ice cold, so they started to massage my hands. But my hands remained cold, so they massaged them for a long time. I saw tears sparkling in their eyes. I had discovered benevolence in their hearts, so I told them, "Thank you. Thank you very much. I don't believe what I have done is not enough to touch your heart. How can you treat so many good people like this? I will tell you with my life that Falun Dafa is great! By all means you should remember this. You must keep the benevolence in your hearts and never lose them. Throughout history, human beings have built temples to worship Buddhas and to entreat Buddhas. But who is Buddha? You should never miss this opportunity. What I am saying is for your own good!" Then two more policemen came. I also told them, "You have met so many Dafa practitioners. This is your good fortune. You have confiscated so many Dafa books. Why haven't you bothered to take a look to see what is inside?" One of the policemen said, "I have read the Zhuan Falun three times already and know you are all good people. I believe that doing good deeds is met with good rewards, and being evil is met with evil returns. I also told my son that he couldn't bully others. I am not like those who hit or curse other people. I don't want to be here. They are short of hands so they transferred me here. I am from ..." Thus we talked a lot about the Fa. My heart was full of joy because I knew that all the suffering I had endured had not been wasted. I protect the Fa with my life. I wanted to fulfill my promises. I had settled my previous accounts and awakened the benevolent conscience with Dafa. Before my release, they gave me two books. One was Essentials for Further Advancement. The other was Zhuan Falun. As I felt joyous at getting the books, one practitioner told me that this was a reward for my having passed another test.
I realize that each test along our cultivation path is designed for our improvement. Each test is a stepping-stone. Cultivation is a very serious matter. When I had regained my consciousness for the last time, I felt that I might not be able to bear it, should they torture me again. I thought about death, and about smashing my head against the wall. But then later, I strengthened my already determined mind and told myself that I shouldn't make such a grave decision casually. My heart was full of indescribable joy as I looked upon death as going home. As soon as this thought came to me, the police took off my handcuffs. Several practitioners had been asked to persuade me to cooperate. They asked me this or that. They said that the policemen worked very hard all day long. It was already 7 or 8 o'clock but they still couldn't go home. They asked me to have mercy on them. One of the practitioners said, "Can't you see how good the policemen are? They worked hard all day but are still trying to convince you." I quickly realized that this was yet another test. I knew that what they were protecting were just ordinary people, and not the Fa. It would be a great for me to not have had a clear understanding based upon Fa, and tears began to run down my cheeks when I saw these practitioners failing that understanding. I pronounced, one word at a time, "What is benevolence? To let them know the greatness of Fa would be the ultimate benevolence. How can you call this benevolence if I watch them do bad things and, to make matters worse, assist and cooperate with them? You need to clearly understand this. This is fundamental. Our practitioners have advanced, wave upon wave, to appeal. If this has failed to touch them, then we ought to validate the Fa with our lives. Such a vast Fa has come to the earth. It would be humanities' disgrace if we could not find an appropriate position for the Fa. Master has said that there has to be a level of Fa for humanity. It will not do without it. If humanity refuses to recognize the Fa, then how can this level of humanity continue to exist?"
I heard a practitioner say that the Fa would be rectified by Master, who may return some day. Another practitioner quickly responded, "Once we understand the principles of the Fa, and we still have our flesh bodies, then we are the guardians of the Fa at this level. Even though I may have reached consummation, as long as I still have the flesh body, I will protect the Fa." Another practitioner spoke with the force of justice, "Do you still want Master to come back and to endure the suffering? How can you ask Master's feet to step on this filthy land? You have to get rid of that evil thought right now. Even if I were a deity at some level today, I would still come down, not fearing to bean ordinary human being, just so I could stand in front of Master to protect the Fa."
Hearing these words, I couldn't help but burst into tears. A firm, solemn, sacred and righteous feeling arose from my heart.
Looking back, I have found the meanings of the Fa that I had awakened to at Tiananmen Square have risen to a higher level. In fact, it is because I am assimilated with the Fa. In honoring the Fa and protecting the Fa, I have been carried to a very, very high level in the Fa rectification. Master has told us to cultivate to attain the righteous enlightenment of selflessness and altruism. I feel that it is no longer important as to whatever high level I could ever cultivate to. My life has become meaningful simply because I am linked to the Fa rectification.