(Clearwisdom.net) It was at the time when I had first finished reading the entire Zhuan Falun, right after I received it the end of 1996. I realized why I experienced various kinds of tribulations and had suffered during the last 30 years of my life. Meanwhile, I realized how precious the Fa is, therefore I have been studying the Fa eagerly.
When I was four years old, I was adopted and grew up in a harsh family environment. I had to protect myself from being beaten, cursed and injured since my very young childhood. In addition, I also suffered from a good deal of bitterness and tribulations during my adulthood. As a result, I formed extreme stubborn attachments and complex thoughts, which were combined with thought karma. These interfered with my studying the Fa, and when I read the Fa, I spoke the words but could not absorb it. After consuming a lot of time, my xinxing improved, but only a little, which meant that some of my attachments were not eliminated, and thus led to my being persecuted time and again. In the spring of 2000, I was captured and arrested while at work and detained for more than two months, because I had gone to Beijing to appeal against the persecution. And finally was forced by the authorities to divorce my wife. In 2003, because I was distributing information materials about Falun Gong and the persecution, I was put in prison for 3.5 years.
When I was released from prison, I had deep regrets for having wasted over three years of valuable time. I then studied the Fa as much as I could, intending to make up for the lost time. However, my mind was numb, which was the result of not having been able to study Dafa for such a long time. I could not remember anything after reading several lectures of Zhuan Falun. As the overall Fa-rectification is progressing greatly, concerning the three things Teacher asked us to do, I am in a hurry and want to improve myself as fast as possible, so that I can assimilate to Dafa and save sentient beings.
In this situation, it became more difficult for me to attain tranquility. I was determined to adjust my heart and be in a steady state, and then I started to transcribe Zhuan Falun word for word. No matter how much I transcribed the Fa each day, I did my best to let each word enter my mind. From the last ten days in July of 2006 until today, I completely transcribed Zhuan Falun 20 times. So far, I have loved to transcribe Zhuan Falun, the more I transcribed it, the less I wanted to stop and continued. I really felt as if I broke through a layer of hard shell every time I finish copying Zhuan Falun. Some of my human thoughts have vanished, and those strong attachments were alleviated. Especially, my resentment toward my stepmother, the pent-up fury in my heart, which was really like what our Teacher said: "granite-like rock," (Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Chicago Conference ). If it were not for Teacher's Fa, no one could remove the rock, I think. Before, I was not touched at all when I studied the Fa and it did not enter my mind. Later, I sometimes felt that this ball of substance (my resentment toward my stepmother), was cleared away somewhat by my sending forth righteous thoughts. But as soon as I stopped my righteous thoughts it appeared again. Through two years of transcribing Zhuan Falun, I now sense that it is already starting to crumble and disintegrate. My mind became clear, and when my state of mind is steady, my righteous thoughts are much more ample and powerful.
Sometime ago, I went to another city to distribute information materials. Someone reported me to the police, and I was arrested on the spot and robbed of lots of materials. Facing the sudden appearance of the police, I was not afraid at all. I did not comply with them and used my wisdom, and calmly clarified the truth about Dafa to them. All of this was the result of my righteous thoughts, which originated from my transcribing Zhuan Falun. That is the natural state when a being assimilates to Dafa. At the end, with Teacher's protection, blessings and strengthening, I walked away with dignity before the eyes of these policemen and other people.