China Fahui | Maturing in Cultivation

(Minghui.org) I took up Falun Dafa in 1996. I was still young at the time and did not have a deep understanding of cultivation. I rarely looked inward and my cultivation did not improve much. After the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) began persecuting Falun Dafa in July 1999, my family suffered a lot of persecution. However, my faith in Master Li (the founder of Falun Dafa) and Dafa has never wavered, no matter what hardships I went through.

I would like to share my cultivation experience from three aspects, which testifies to how I matured under Master’s compassionate care.

Losing My Mother

My mother suddenly passed away in the summer of 2019. She had been practicing Dafa for more than 20 years and had always been in good health. Her death was like a bolt from the blue for me.

I had always been dependent on my mother since I was little. I had low confidence and discussed everything with my mother. I shared everything in my life with her. Her company made my life more meaningful.

Losing my mother was like a nightmare to me. I had a hard time accepting it. I couldn’t stop crying, and couldn’t close my eyes at night. She occupied my mind all the time and I recalled all of our times together. It was too hard for me to bear. I knew that I was taken over by sentiments, but I couldn’t get out of it. I was tormented to the point of not knowing how to continue living.

A fellow practitioner reminded me that my feelings for my mother were too strong. She told me not to worry about my mother and she believed that all Dafa practitioners who departed the human world early would still have a good future. 

I repeatedly recited Master’s teaching:

“You will have had countless “mothers,” both human and otherwise, over the course of your reincarnations. And the same could be said for how many children you’ve had over all your lifetimes. Neither mother nor child recognizes the other in their next life, and any karmic debts that remain between the two will have to be settled just like with anyone else.” (The Sixth Talk, Zhuan Falun)

But I still couldn’t suppress my sadness and I let my feelings get the best of me. One day, I suddenly lost my vision, and I almost fainted. I immediately asked for help from Master: “Master, I can’t fall down! Master, I can’t fall down! Please, Master, help take away the substance of sentiment from me. I want to pass the tribulation!” 

At that very moment, I clearly felt Master’s support and I managed to remain standing. My body gradually returned to normal. 

I still shed tears from time to time but I could control myself and wept only when nobody was around. A practitioner suggested I memorize Hong Yin to help get rid of my attachment to my mother. I decided to memorize Hong Yin V as it had been published not long ago. It took me about six months to memorize it more than 30 times. I often could not help crying while reciting it, because the Fa awakened me: I came from heaven with a mission to save people, and everything in the human world is like a dream.

During the process of memorizing the Fa, my attachment to my mother faded gradually and without my knowing it. Now I am rational on this matter, as if that sentiment is separated from myself in time and space, far away from me. I no longer have the need to talk to anyone about things in my life like how I used to need my mother. I used to cry whenever I felt wronged in life but I don’t cry as much anymore. Thank you, Master, for helping me become stronger.

Joy from Saving People

I had the desire to go out and tell people the truth about Dafa at the end of 2019. With no experience but attachment of fear, it was difficult for me to put into action. But I wanted to blaze a path myself, so I kept encouraging myself to overcome all difficulties.

I took five booklets of Dafa materials when I went out the first time. I sent forth righteous thoughts for a long time before leaving home. I was nervous like a soldier going into battle for the first time. I rode my electric bike for some distance, looking for people to talk to. This person seemed not suitable; that person seemed not approachable. I kept looking at the passing crowd to find the right one, but I just didn’t dare to open my mouth.

I finally gathered the courage and approached a lady in her 50s by giving her a booklet. She was excited, “I am really lucky. I haven’t come here for a walk for some time. Here I am today and met a Falun Dafa practitioner.” 

She told me that she believed in Falun Dafa very much and that her illness was cured by reciting “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good.” She talked more about the goodness of Dafa and asked for an extra copy of the booklet for her relative. I know that Master encouraged me by sending a person with predestined relationship with Dafa to boost my confidence.

Afterward, I successfully gave out the remaining three booklets. Although I only talked to a limited number of people, I indeed had taken my first step. I was full of joy on my way home and my body felt especially relaxed. I could sense that Master had taken away some human-level substance from me after I completed the sacred deed.

After I had the joyful experience for the first time, I persistently went out with a few copies of truth-clarification materials when I had time. I did it without any difficulties since Master had made all the arrangement for me. I knew that Master actually did everything for me in other dimensions. Every time, I experienced physical changes afterward and knew that Master cleansed me. My body was especially light and I was in a good mood, something I had never experienced before with just studying the Fa or sending forth righteous thoughts.

Saving People During the Pandemic

After the pandemic broke out in early 2020, all the communities were locked down. I was shocked and afraid that people who had not quit the CCP and its affiliates would face elimination. I had heard of the prophecy that the majority of people would be wiped out and imagined how terrible it would be if it happened in China.

I reminded myself not to be held back by the lockdown measures since I needed to go out to save people, even if I could only save one. I sent forth righteous thoughts daily: the lockdown had nothing to do with me; the old forces had no control over me; I only followed Master’s arrangement; I must go out to save people; I disintegrated all the interference from the old forces.

An elderly practitioner in our area also had a strong desire to save people. She had more experience in truth-clarification and had been doing it in an upright manner with no fear. The two of us went out to distribute the booklets titled Secret of Surviving Catastrophe and another one about prophecy, which were well received by people as they were worried about their safety and sought ways to save their lives.

My righteous thoughts grew stronger during the process. I took more materials with me, from five copies at the beginning, to ten, fifteen, and more. Sometimes we also went to the countryside to reach more people. The total number of people we persuaded to withdraw from the CCP and its affiliates was more than 10,000 in the year 2020. Then I stopped tracking the number because I realized that I was attached to the amount, and instead, I should just do it without any pursuit.

I have been keeping up with the truth clarification and constantly striding forward. Most of the people I met were grateful for the blessings we brought and the materials we gave them.

Once, I met a middle-aged woman fashionably dressed. When I politely gave her a booklet, she was surprised and asked me, “Are you a Falun Gong (practitioner)?” I answered yes. She said, “You are so young, and you are a Falun Gong (practitioner)? I have been trying to find Falun Gong for many years. I finally met you! I have to take a good look at it.”

I told her more about Falun Gong: that many highly educated young intellectuals in foreign countries are practicing Falun Gong; it has spread to more than 100 countries and regions around the world; people from all walks of life practice Falun Gong regardless of nationality or age; and the propaganda from the CCP is all lies. She happily agreed to quit the CCP and its affiliates.

At one point during the pandemic, the atmosphere was tense, with police patrolling the streets and loudspeakers shouting for people to stay home. People faced possible detention for just getting out. There was barely anyone on the streets. I still went out, despite the situation. I chose to walk on small streets or alleys to avoid police patrols.

I came across a gated community and was able to talk to people over the fence. A woman in her 50s expressed her great appreciation after I talked to her. She was curious and asked, “How did you get out? Aren’t you afraid of the virus?” I told her that I really wanted to tell more people how to stay safe in this special time, without concern for myself. She said, “What a brave girl you are!”

I knew that this was encouragement from Master and that what we practitioners were doing was selfless and precious. I felt different under this tense atmosphere, proud and sacred, and I sensed Master’s support and blessing. Things went especially well that day.

Another time, I met a middle-aged man who was feeding a horse. I went up to him and told him the truth of Dafa. He was polite and civilized, but didn’t accept the booklet, as if he was embarrassed to accept things from others. 

I became anxious and said, “The pandemic is so severe and this is a rare opportunity for me to come out and meet you. Please cherish your encounter with a Dafa practitioner.” My sincerity at the moment changed him. He accepted the material and agreed to withdraw from the CCP and its affiliates. I was truly happy for him.

I had several dangerous encounters, which were all dissolved under the protection of Master.

Memorizing the Fa

While in school and away from home, I hardly ever did any Dafa exercises, sent forth righteous thoughts, or clarified the truth. I only studied the Fa from time to time. I lived just like an everyday person. I started to have minor headaches constantly and my head felt heavy and dizzy. I wanted to be more diligent in my cultivation, but I could not do it. I had always had a wish, since 1996, to memorize Zhuan Falun, but hadn’t been able to do it.

Later, when an opportunity came for me to have time to do it, I made up my mind to memorize Zhuan Falun until I succeeded. It took determination, patience, perseverance, and capability to bear hardship to memorize the Fa. I began with memorizing one paragraph at a time. After I was able to recite a paragraph five times in a row, I moved on to the next paragraph. It took me about a year to memorize the whole book once.

The second time, I memorized one section at a time, which progressed slowly. I encouraged myself: don’t rush, just take the time to do it. I was no longer anxious.

During the times that I was in a bad cultivation state, I had to spend a few hours on a small paragraph. But I told myself not to worry or give up since I studied the Fa for a few hours. In retrospect, it was my thought karma and human notions blocking me from memorizing the Fa. I eliminated my impatience in the process. It took me about eight months to memorize the whole book for the second time.

Then I set a long-term goal for myself: spend seven months on my third try to memorize the Fa, six months on my fourth try, etc. I hoped to keep speeding up my memorization until I was able to recite one lecture a day, about the same speed of reading the Fa. I didn’t know how many years this process would take, but as long as I increased my speed, I made progress. I urged myself to persevere in this process despite any difficulties ahead of me.

Though my goal was set, it was difficult to put it into action. There were all kinds of distractions that left me with no time to memorize the Fa. So I had to sleep less. Sometimes I enlightened to many Fa principles while memorizing the Fa with deep concentration to resist distractions. Because of so much concentration, I was even memorizing the Fa in my sleep. Sometimes, after spending a numbers of hours on one paragraph without giving up, my head became much clearer. I knew that Master removed a lot of thought karma for me.

When I memorized the Fa for the 13th time, I found myself still forgetting what I’d just memorized a short time ago. I was frustrated and did not know when I could reach my goal. 

Then I was reminded of what Master said in Zhuan Falun, 

“However much you sacrifice is the amount you will gain...” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun)

I could not hold back my tears. From then on, my eagerness to get results gradually went away. Whenever I pursued results, Master’s words echoed in my mind. I must persist in memorizing the Fa.

My headaches disappeared without my realizing while memorizing the Fa. My head became clear without random thoughts. I used to be a sentimental person who loved to reminisce. Memorizing the Fa has changed my personality. I have become stronger, and more mature. My righteous thoughts have been strengthened as well. When my memorizing the Fa went well, my truth clarification work went smoothly; otherwise, it was difficult. I suggest that all practitioners persist in memorizing the Fa: you will benefit a lot.

Many people are anxiously waiting to be saved. After I made breakthroughs and stepped out to save people face to face, I experienced the sensation of sanctity and the mission of saving people. Such beauty can only be felt through one’s own personal experience.