[European Fa Conference] Stepping Out of Humanness

(Minghui.org) Esteemed Master and fellow practitioners:

In my two-part experience sharing, I first wish to share with you about being involved in Shen Yun ticket sales, and my cultivation process. The second part is about becoming a full-fledged team member of the German Epoch Times, which would culminate into full-time employment.

Part 1: Working with Shen Yun Ticketing

When participating in the Shen Yun ticketing, I was involved in the distribution of the seating quotas through the various sales systems. When the pandemic started in 2020 and we had to postpone many shows, it became a huge challenge.

There were many ups and downs over the months until eventually performances could take place again in 2022. There were many cultivation opportunities that presented themselves. Taking ticket sales for example, we first had to figure out the current situation, and develop a plan to keep customers informed. When creating the plan, we had to work quickly and be very flexible. 

My attachment to comfort was particularly evident, because we were working late into the night, a time I would have preferred to relax. Keeping my cool was also often challenged when plans changed. However, I was able to let go of my need to cling to a specific plan. The following thoughts helped me a lot: “At Shen Yun, many sentient beings are saved. We must find the best possible solution, act genuinely, and not push away any sentient being. Even though we are only the presenter and part of the Shen Yun performing group, we have to set very high standards for ourselves so as not to cause damage to Shen Yun’s image.”

Even when the situation returned to a normal schedule in the autumn of 2021 and we were able to restart sales, some last-minute changes happened. For example, some theaters wanted a chessboard-style seating map, or the quota was suddenly reduced, so customers had to be rebooked. In addition, the projection technology changed, which is why there was suddenly a newly blocked-off area for the projector, but we started the ticket sales with the old projector blocked-off area. Many other situations required quick action, where a plan had to be worked out. We wrote emails and the hotline contacted customers to assure them that anyone in the need to know would be informed of any changes.

Sometimes, I felt resentment toward other practitioners for being late in informing me of changes, and I felt that their planning was poor. In such situations, I noticed that I was too attached to plans and became dissatisfied when something went the opposite from what I had planned. 

Dealing with the Unforeseen

I realized that everything had been arranged, and ultimately an equally good or better effect was achieved when things went differently than what I would have preferred and I therefore had to take a step back. The fact that I was informed late about changes, from my point of view, also pointed out to me that I took myself as being too important, and thought that I had to be informed of everything. I realized that holding a grudge does not do any good, because the task has to be done either way. I asked myself whether I should do the task now, holding grudges in my heart, and possibly make mistakes, or maintain a benevolent heart and simply hold the thought of saving sentient beings.

It was only after the 2022 Shen Yun season finished that I realized that practitioners always do their best and short-term tasks cannot be avoided. In fact, I got into a situation that was the opposite, where I did my best, and was accused of having a bad plan.

With my saved up vacation time, I was able to help in many Shen Yun cities with stage setup and tear down, and with the box office. Especially during stage setup with its short time frame, I realized that I had to work quickly and carefully, and just do what I was told to do. At that moment I was just a tool. In Füssen, however, everything turned out differently.

At the beginning it was assumed that the stage setup would be very easy because a lot of materials that were kept at the theater could be used. Therefore no company had to be hired. Unfortunately, the information changed, which is why suddenly a lot had to be done, and some items had to be rented. I was told that I would be the contact between Shen Yun and the theater, and that I would have to take responsibility for the rented materials because there was no project manager from an external company, and the practitioner who usually takes over the task was not available. 

Resolving the Unforeseen 

At first I was shocked, and then I doubted that I would be able to manage the task. After all, I had been just a tool before, was not involved in the planning and wasn’t given a complete overview. How would I be able to take on the task? The practitioner who’d contacted me encouraged me, and together we broke the task down into its component parts. After understanding the components, I was confident that it would work out, and asked Master to help me do the task well. I also thought that this is now the way it was arranged, and I would not be given a task that was impossible to do. After all, during the stage construction in the previous several theaters, I had already gained some new knowledge that I could now put to good use. We looked at the theater one day before the setup, and I planned in my head all the steps I had to take. In the meantime, I found that a theater employee would take care of exactly the components that I didn’t know yet. After everything worked well during the setup, my confidence in Master’s arrangements was strengthened, and I thought that I had indeed not been given an impossible task.

In Frankfurt, during the stage setup – one day before the show – I noticed that only six rows were set up in the parquet area between the stalls and the orchestra pit. But we had sold eight rows. My heart did two things at the same time: it beat so fast that it wanted to jump out of my body, and at the same time it sank into despair. I tried to calm down and could hardly believe it. I verified with the stage manager that because of the orchestra pit, it was indeed only possible to set up six rows in the parquet instead of eight. I sought to blame myself, “How could such a mistake happen, how did you not know?” 

But, since I had not been really involved at all in making arrangements with the theater and working out the floor plan, I looked to blame others and noticed how a grudge was about to build up. Immediately I became alert, eliminated it and said to myself: “You must calm down now. Only when you are calm can a solution be found. Empty your head. It has happened now, now you have to make the best of it.” A little while later I was calm again and began to think. In doing so, it struck me that it was again an arrangement of Master that I, the only one with the dual role of ticketing and stage setup, was right there, and thus the situation had come to my attention a day before and not just a few hours before the show started. 

The main coordinator, the ticket sales team, the Shen Yun production manager and the individuals who handled theater seat assignments met and we considered how best to defuse the situation. Together, we brainstormed several ideas and made the decision on the morning of show day that we would compress the rows slightly, allowing seven rows to be set up instead of six. In addition, all the rows were re-labeled. As a result, ticketing scheduled the rebooking, the hotline called the customers to be on the safe side, the customers’ barcodes were adjusted as necessary, and on site the new tickets were handed over with compensation if necessary. It was incredible to see how we all came together as one, and were able to solve such a task so well in such a short time. The vast majority of customers were satisfied and the show could start on time.

Looking back, I realize that everything is arranged. I am only a small gear in a huge mechanism, and must simply do what I have to do so that the mechanism continues to function. I must not let myself be distracted by attachments and suddenly turn faster or in the opposite direction, but put aside everything human. All challenges can be resolved.

Part 2: Working Full Time with German Epoch Times

I began my volunteer stint at the German Epoch Times as a programmer in May 2021. I did this alongside my full-time job, where I am also a programmer. Over the months, I was asked from time to time if I would like to work more hours for The Epoch Times and therefore quit my ordinary job or accept a part-time position there. I always brushed off the full-time job on the grounds that I couldn’t imagine living on the big difference in pay. At the time, I’d accumulated a lot of overtime and vacation time at my ordinary job, so I took a lot of Fridays off to be able to work for The Epoch Times. I then always held on to the perspective that after the overtime and vacation were used up, I would go part-time at my regular job and then work only four days. 

At that time, I didn’t look deeply inside to see why I didn’t want to give up the attachment to money, and whether there were other attachments. I could only think of many excuses as to why I needed the money, and that part-time was what I could manage at this time.

The management asked me if I would like to be the head of the IT department a year later, in May 2022. The IT department was very weak and needed someone in charge urgently so that The Epoch Times could grow. Immediately, my heartbeat quickened, I felt hot, and attachments came up, such as: craving for recognition, feeling important, or thinking it’s great to be in power. On the other hand, I appreciated the trust that was put in me, and saw the chance to gain virtue. During the conversation, I quickly tried to push away the bad thoughts. Afterwards, I looked at them one by one and made it clear with strong righteous thoughts that I didn’t want them to have a part in my decision process.

For about two weeks I thought about it, during which I realized what a big responsibility the position holds, and whether I could really do it part time. At that point, the IT department was still very small. So, I sat down and contemplated: “Who else can do it? There is no one else who can do it at the moment. Do you see the need for the job? Do you want The Epoch Times to grow?” Then, doubt arose in my mind: “Can you manage to fill the position?”

I realized that Master had arranged the way for me. I was able to gain a broad IT knowledge during my studies and subsequent work, and for a few years I have been technically managing a team that is now ten people in size. Besides the technical knowledge, I have also gained several other skills that would be helpful for the job. The skills are given by Master and one should not become arrogant, I learned painfully in the past. In this respect, I thanked Master, and with confidence I could tell management that I would accept the job. However, I expressed concern that it might be difficult doing it very part time, and that I would continue to work 32 hours a week at my ordinary job.

In the weeks that followed, I continued to be asked on and off by some employees if I would like to work full time. So I started looking deeper inside. I found that money was a big factor. However, along with that, I also realized the comfort and the security that being an official for life in my ordinary job gave me. I also found it difficult to simply say “goodbye” to the previous stage of my life. I felt uncomfortable abandoning colleagues and the project I’d been involved in. I enjoyed the work and the colleagues were nice. It was just a great environment where I could earn money, which was a lot for me as a single person. It also made me feel important and validated, in that the users were happy. I was praised by colleagues and bosses, and my work for the German State was also good for Germany.

Even though I was aware of the attachments, I still didn’t want to let them go and preferred to take the easy way out.

A little while later, the requirement to go to The Epoch Times in Berlin came up, so I went there for nine days in June. I didn’t have to take a vacation because I had a home office at my ordinary work and extended the “home” to Berlin. Those nine days were the beginning of the change in my thoughts.

I quickly felt that the field was very strong. Unlike the home office where I am mostly alone, I was now surrounded by many practitioners in an office. Shortly before, a cook was hired so the very delicious and also free lunches and dinners were eaten together. In addition, Zhuan Falun was studied together in the morning before starting to work, and Master's newer lectures were read in the evening after most people had finished work. In addition, the first four exercises were done together. I quickly learned to appreciate this good environment. I was much more motivated to work and was more capable than usual. Also, I began to look forward to the end of the ordinary job so that I could start working for The Epoch Times. Suddenly, I realized that the ordinary job didn’t seem so important to me anymore.

After those nine days, I strongly set my mind to go to Berlin more often in order to work better for The Epoch Times. My strong righteous thoughts were heard and even occasions where I had to go to Berlin for my ordinary job appeared, and I could just add the weekend before and after.

Moreover, after the nine days in Berlin I sat down again and wanted to look deeper inside. In the end, I understood that all my concerns could be resolved – they were no more than feelings. The only question left was whether I wanted to continue to hold on to the human side or break out and follow the path of a cultivator who can do Dafa work full time, and help Master save sentient beings while consummating my own world. On the subject of the security of an official’s job and life, I came to realize that this is only security from a human point of view. It is much safer to follow Master, because he takes care of us, and I have to have confidence.

I am embarrassed to admit that two months ago I did not want to let go of the human aspect and told the management that I would not go full time, but would reduce my working hours to 26 hours a week so that I could work a few more hours for The Epoch Times in the evenings during the week. Because of what I had previously learned, the announcement was like a confession for me.

I didn’t dare tell anyone about my thoughts and the decision to prioritize the human side over cultivation because I was ashamed.

As the weeks went by, I noticed myself becoming more and more disconnected from my ordinary work. It seemed less and less important to me, and I decided to work for The Epoch Times. In my free time, I also stopped thinking about ordinary work and started thinking about The Epoch Times. My sense of responsibility and affiliation with The Epoch Times was continuously strengthened.

In August, three staff members and I accepted the invitation by the English Epoch Times and flew to New York City to learn from them. Upon arrival, I immediately had the impression that the office was a bubble of calm in the middle of the chaos of Manhattan. I felt like I was entering another world. The field was very strong. The practitioners are diligent and work from morning to night. I could quickly see the gap between myself and them, and that they are able to remain so calm despite the heavy workload and pressure. Even when I pulled them out of work to ask if they could teach me something, they remained calm, and either immediately gave me time or offered me an appointment a short time later. I still have room for improvement on this point.

Of course, there were also questions about the full-time position.

Two days after the return flight, a meeting of almost all Epoch Times employees took place. We spent a weekend together in the surroundings of Berlin in a vacation village, so that we could become one body, move up, and bring the project forward. We were able to make good use of the opportunity to present what we had learned, and the new plans.

On the last day I realized what a great arrangement of Master’s it was. As if riding on a big wave, we came back from America and picked up all the staff of the German Epoch Times. I have the impression that we are now all on the wave together, uniting our strong righteous thoughts to continue to grow and save more sentient beings.

On the way back I listened to Shen Yun music in the subway and listened within myself. In doing so, I saw how every particle of matter in me wanted to pull me in one direction. They joined a larger stream that has only one goal: Full time! I was so moved by the scene that tears came to my eyes. My problem had resolved itself. I couldn’t help but answer Master’s call and inwardly proclaim with pride and a loud voice: Yes, I am working full time for The Epoch Times to help Master save sentient beings and complete my own world!

Epilogue

Now, I know that I am not saying “goodbye” to my previous life and parting with it. Instead, it is a part of the arrangement that trained me to be able to understand and carry out the duties at The Epoch Times well. I want to trust Master and his arrangements more, so I am confident that our small IT team will grow, and we can accomplish our mission.

Thank you, Master!

(Sharing paper submitted to the 2022 European Fa Conference)